|
Things you can do
Things you can read
They say there's a book inside everybody. Let the book out with Admanya blogs. Vent your feelings about anything that pops into your head. It might be rocket science or your neighbour's cat. Start now! Its easy and fun! Blog CAN ONE FORGIVE EASILY?Posted by bharathi on 13 September 2010 READ: 859 
In todays fast changing world we come across many institutions,counselling centres,NGOs,rehab centres etc which cater to various needs of the soceity.They help in building up the confidence level of an individual,by providing assistance in all possible manners .They conduct workshops to provide practical guidance to people suffering from different kinds of mental ailments.I feel one must and should attend a workshop on FORGIVENESS .This helps in purifying our minds of the vengeance that dwells deep inside our minds towards any one who has hurt us in some way or the other.Reminds me of the old age proverb ..to err is human and to forgive divine.
In a forgiveness workshop that my close friend priya attended some days ago, Som, one of the participants, mentioned that his brother had abused and also molested him as a child. He said he could never forgive him. After a few minutes of shocked silence, priya gently said, If you can not forgive, then you can not dance, you can not sing, and you can not smile.How very true! This is precisely what happens when there is no forgiveness. Our ability to danceĀto move emotionally, to give, to love, to feel alive and free is not just impaired but also stuck. We cannot move forward locked in the past of actions,prejudices and hurts. Broken families,physical and mental torture, self-hate, guilt and shame leading to depression, huge amounts of anger, bitterness, and closed-heartedness are all parts of this inability to forgive. We do not realize that it holds back our joy and laughter without realising how, by holding onto the hurts , we create more grief for ourselves. The re-runs of our memory tapes, details of who said, what and to whom, of how it all happened, of the injustice and blame or the guilt and shame have never relieved anyone of the grief; on the contrary they have only hardened our feelings, made the wounds deeper and made our thoughts venomous thus denying ourselves the ability of dancing, smiles and love. From a rational point of view,according to me, it is impossible to forgive. In simplistic terms, hurt means seeking retribution. The person who caused the hurt is not the one suffering, we are and by recalling we are aggravating our wounds rather than curing them. To forgive includes fully acknowledging our feelings. We know and feel the pain, but the desire to no longer continue the suffering is stronger; we care enough about ourselves to not want to carry the anger or sadness any longer. Carrying our past hurts is like carrying unnecessary heavy baggage. Till we abandon it at some point, there is no relief from the weight. As is often said, We have all experienced being hurt by someone, such as our parents, lover,spouses or friends. But it is not about denying the hurt; it is actually about opening and meeting the hurt, and then the hurt itself becomes a deepening of our heart. In that moment, it is natural for forgiveness to occur. [ From the book Be the Change] Meditation with detached thought helps forgiveness and compassion to ourselves, making friends with who we are, knowing we cannot change the past but we can change our attitude toward it. As we do this, boundaries that normally keep us isolated from intimacy, boundaries that have been maintained over the years to protect us from being hurt, begin to come down, like old walls crumbling and falling. Only you are responsible for what you do, think and feel. You can choose to hold on to painful events, like a weight around your neck, or you can choose to remove that burden by releasing it (giving it no more emotional energy and therefore power) and living a happier life despite past circumstances. In other words... let the past be in the past, and live in the now moment. You can not change what happened in the past, but you have choice over how you live now. Comments (7) spirited wrote on 13 September, 2010
If I understand the proverb the wise men realized that human cannot forgive they can only err!
Ranger wrote on 13 September, 2010
Bharathi, It depends on what wrong has been done and whether the person really feels sorry. But, if one can forgive, it is a great feeling, much better than taking revenge.
bharathi wrote on 13 September, 2010
thanx to spirited and ranger for their views.ranger im sure you are happy to see me back!
cosmicbomber wrote on 13 September, 2010
@ Bharati, we are all happy to see you back :) Keep writing the blogs with your humane touch.
OscarWild wrote on 13 September, 2010
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
bharathi wrote on 14 September, 2010
thanx to CB and oscar for their comments.hopefully i will try my best to post atleast three a week.i need the encouragement from you all ...for me to succeed.thanx again...bharathi
maaz_nawaz wrote on 30 September, 2010
Congrats for winning the best blog of the month..... Keep penning
About this Blogger
Subscribe to bharathi's blogs You can stay up to date with bharathi's blogs via these feeds. bharathi's blogs Feed (RSS) Latest Blog Posts Washington Post Slams Mamata Banerjee Ban IPL Tournament to save Cricket: Dr. Subramanian Swamy Let's Create What We Want In Our Life The Taj Mahal and Amber Fort - Two Must Watch Heritage site in North India Latest Blogs by bharathi Hot Blogs by bharathi eunuchs....castrated males in disguise of women HOW CLEAN IS YOUR SURROUNDING? blind belief...where are we headed for? |
